anniversary

i shed you. came out
from the molting
shining and new.

i wanted and needed
so badly to lose your
weight and shake of light,
the heavy nervousness
that had become my life.

i was well for awhile,
but then i fell apart --
all fire moving forward,
then bam, the lights went out.

something in me snapped
completely clean, abandoned reason,
and took showers in the dark,
much the worse for wear.

we were no good together,
were we? we were too
much the same, we were.
we were, weren't we?

we never quite fit together --
almost, but the space was so
small air whistled thin between
the pieces of us, chipped bone
aching dull and constant --
piercing sharp at the memory of rain.